Feeding Tube

At 28 weeks, a baby has not yet developed the sucking reflex needed to nurse or take milk from a bottle, so a feeding tube is inserted. Their digestive tracts are also not able to handle the intake of a full-term baby. Too much can cause a perforation that would require surgery to correct. Buzzy's first feeding consisted of 3 mL slowly pumped by machine into the tube in her stomach.

Where most mothers nurse their newborns on demand, I had to go behind a curtain and pump. I would then label the container and leave it with the nurse on duty, who would either use it for the next scheduled feeding or store it on the refrigerator shelf designated for Buzzy. I continued to pump for 5 1/2 months.

Buzzy could not leave the hospital until she could feed on her own. With each bottle feeding, she was allowed to take what she could, and what she couldn't finish in thirty minutes would be given to her by tube. Then, she would get a break from the bottle for the next feeding. This part of our NICU journey brought me the most frustration because I was the least successful in getting Buzzy to take a bottle. Her nurses could do it, as could her father, but for some reason, she would not feed from a bottle with me. One attempt resulted in a significant desat during which she started turning blue. The nurse took over, and that was too much. I turned around and headed for the bathroom where I collapsed into tears. Looking back, I realize that the nurse had far more experience with preemies, but at the time, it just did not feel right that I could not feed my baby.

When we finally went home, feeding was not so much the issue as weight gain was, and it was for this reason that I did not put much effort into switching her from bottle to the breast. More so than the mother of a full-term baby, I needed to know exactly how much she was taking in, and as strange as it was to pump and feed my child by bottle, I don't really feel as though I missed out. I did what I had to do. This is what parenting a preemie is all about.